At home recuperating

So call it another Chelsea moment.... but I am at home all swollen, battered and bruised. On Sat night I fell and found out Sun from those GREAT (insert sarcasm here) doctor's at the KW hospital that I broke my collar bone. My shoulder really hurts but the bruise looks ten times worse... meh... what can you do?!?
LOL... This adventure to the hospital (made enjoyable by Glenna's presence) only proves my theory that doctors in KW are only doctors there because they could not hack it elsewhere... ouch right?!?... well this is my opinion and here's why:
I got to the hospital at 6pm and was shortly thereafter carted to the examining room... fine right?!? Well, we ended up waiting 6 hours in that room... waiting to be scene. 6 hours seems right right?!? but there were people who had arrived after us being scene.. so finally I went and asked the nurse how much more of a wait it would be.. I mean they didn't even give me ice for my throbbing shoulder and neck.. and Glenna was the one who had to steal a blanket for me since it was soooo cold in the room with that stupid paper dress on.
But I digress... so when I went to see the nurse.. she said that it would be 4 more people in front of us... and then she said "well some people have been here since 6!" The way that she said it was so rude and insulting I had to reply.... "Like me?!?" "No" she said "you've been here since 7:30pm"... "Ummm No! I got here at 5:45pm".... "Oh.. Ok I'll go and see what is holding the doctor up then".
When she came back she explained that the doctor who was about to see me got called into an emergency and never put my chart back... so they would have seen me 2 hours ago... but didnt have my chart. Oy! I understand that hospitals are underfunded and understaffed... but this was sheer incompetence!
When the doctor finally cam in he did some tests, then told me I could get dressed. So I did.. I struggled back into my shirt and sweater... and then.. the nurse informed me that since I was getting an x-ray I needed to be back in the gown.... OY! I smiled and put it back on... but I swear I was swearing under my breath.
Finally I got the x-ray, some ice for my then throbbing shoulder and the news that I had broken my collar bone. "There is nothing we can do for this injury except let it heal on its own. Keep moving it though so as to keep it unfrozen".
So I went home, throbbing, wishing that I hadn't just wasted 6 hours of my life for something that couldn't have been fixed in the first place.
When I got to Toronto though, I was informed that I have to be in a sling... and that I should have been in one since the beginning... yay for contradicting doctor statements.
So here I sit... the pain is a tad better.. I may sling it tonight.. cause it is swollen and hurting a bit.
This day was very productive.. I went down town and got some of my paperwork stamped and notarized by the Korean consulate... I have been putting that off for way too long.
Anyways... my arm is throbbing.. so I am going to go lay down... I'm heading back to the KW on Thursday (depending on if I am feeling better or not... it is still pretty darn sore)....
Hugs

Tear

I just accepted my contract to teach English in Korea. I am going to Kuro Seoul.
Wow, I feel.... happy and extremely sad at the same time.

Things are becoming a little too real

So a list of cities to work in came today... this is the first step of the final steps I have left in my Korean departure. I was given 4 cities to chose from... and well... 2 of them are in Seoul... and since I have made some contacts in Seoul... and well Seoul is somewhat like Toronto... chose to accept contracts from those two cities.... contracts should be coming in this evening.
All that is left is to read them over... decide which is best for me... and then start the visa process. They say that from start to finish the visa process is 3 weeks... so it looks like my May 1st departure date... is holding.
I am done at Crawford at 9am on April 25 (30days) and then I have the week off to say my goodbyes and finish last minute things. I may go home though in that week... some part of me just wants to disappear without the whole hoopla... cause well... I have come to make a couple of really great friendships these past years... and well... water works are definetly foreseen.
I doubt though that Glenna would let me run off without a final night out... lol... I am actually looking forward to that... though I will probably NEVER have another roommate again (I swear when/if I ever get married... my husband is going to be getting his own apartment).... I am grateful for the year that I have had here... it has been a learning and growing experience... emotionally and spiritually.... see I told you that the water works were inevitable... lol...
Anyways... I am just waiting for the contracts to arrive tonight.. and I am going to be spending the weekend looking them over and doing a lot of thinking. Thanks to a couple of people in Korea, I know what to look for in a contract... and what to avoid... I foresee this being a good experience.
On a lighter note... I am learning how to cook.. I have recently mastered Chicken stir fry with Sweet and Sour sauce... and Pork Chops with apple sauce. Truthfully, cooking isn't as scary as I had made it out to be... it just takes some imagination... and well patience. Though I am going to miss my Swiss Chalet (though they never seemed to fully cook the chicken properly)... I strongly feel that I will be able to cook some things while I am overseas.... and if all else fails... they do have food joints that deliver in Korea as well... lol.
Anyways... that is all on the Korea update field.

Yet another school shooting

There has been yet another school shooting in the United States. On the heals of the Columbine Anniversary, another troubled teen has entered their school and shot both peers and teachers. 10 people were killed. This time, the event occurred in Minnesota.
It is sad that even after the horrific Columbine events, these tragedies still seem to occur. Last week, a similar plan was uncovered in a Newfoundland school.
Its is disheartening to know that these teens, feel that the only way of being heard is through the barrel of a gun.
Bullying is NOT a right of passage. Though the repercussions of bullying were sadly felt after the Columbine tragedy in 1999, this new school shooting just reinforces the fact that we have a lot more to deal with in order to eradicate this problem entirely.
Sadly, if we do not recognize the problem and put all of our efforts into treating both the aggressor and victim alike, school shootings will continue... as victims turn to violence to deal with their problems.

Playing with my new camera - these are my pets - Nige

This picture doesnt do Nigikwe (Nige - it means girlfriend in Objibway) any justice. She is a HUGE firecracker. Now that she has entered the terrible twos... well you can only imagine... a puppy that doesnt realize her own brute stength.

Channelle

This is Channelle (aka Chay). She is my kitty. I love the fact that she has such a strong personality.. umm ok.. that she can be a real bitch. She is kinda like me... takes no crap from noone.

Chloe

This is Chloe. Doesnt she look great in her new bandana.... LOL... She is sooo sensitve. When my dad laughed at her once because of her new haircut... she hid under his bed for an entire week. AW

Lavender

This is Lavender. She is one of the sweetest creatures around. When she was a baby she had a really high temp that caused her to go cross-eyed and well.. a tad dumb.. but I think it gives her character.

My new luggage set - D day is vastly approaching

This is my new luggage set (it has 4 more similar pieces of various sizes). My mom wanted something that represented me... i think it has enough pink in it to achieve that.. and of course be easy to find on the airport carosel.

Limbo sucks

41 days and counting!... 30 til I am done at Crawford... WOOOO HOOOO! (though nerves have kinda set in)

The truth always has a way of coming out... So why then try to repress it?

So a family friend called this morning with very upsetting news. The man that she has lived with for the past 12 years and the father of her 2 children... is gay. If that weren't enough... she discovered that he has been having "rendez-vous" with other men.
Needless to say this event has rocked her world... the man she loved... she thought that she knew... is a completely different person.
My heart goes out to her... she not only has a huge decision to make about her future relationship with this person... but she now needs to get tested for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. Factor in the emotional sense of rejection, loss and betrayal... and well my heart aches for her and her family.
My heart also hurts for this man. In this day and age... to still have to hide your sexuality.... to attempt to fit into the stereotypical norms... well it makes me wonder what progress we have made... and question whether we have even moved from the circa-1950 Rock Hudson affair.
I strongly believe that in his own way, this man loved and cared for his partner (fiancée).
I am usure though as to why he would do such a thing. I am a strong believer that being gay is not something that you can just shut off and pretend is not there. Though some may disagree with me... I believe that when you attempt to hide your true self.. not only from others.. but you as well... well the truth always has a way of coming out.
I hope that this family can recover from this... not the fact that the man was gay... but that he was forced to hide it and pretend that he wasn't... the fact that while he was attempting to find his true self... he managed to deceive, hurt, betray and jeopardize those that he probably loved the most.

And so it begins

One of the perks of working the midnight shift at Crawford is that you have the following week off! This time is basically spent trying to sleep at regular hours. Though it does sound pretty inticing to just lay around at home, watching tv and ordering swiss chalet, I chose to be more productive this week... and go home.
I am currently in Markham this week with my folks. It is amazing what a couple of months does to a person. I didnt really notice how home sick I was, until Chay (my kitty) crawled onto my lap and fell asleep.
I mean Gump and Leah are alright... but Chay (along with Lavender) are my babies. I love the fact that they both have such distinct personalities... Chay is the bitch... and Lav is the baby. I had forgotten how it felt to have Chloe (the poodle) jump under your covers and sleep at your feet... and to have Nige (the huskey) growl at you as you passed by.
In addition... I had forgotten how nice it is just to sit down and watch a movie with my parents... as much as I like to deny it... I am such a family oriented person... and though I like my life in Kitchener.. sometimes yearn for the comforts of home.
LOL... I say this all after I have begun packing. Yes... the packing stages has started to begin. This week was also productive... as I have managed to eliminate (with a couple of items as exceptions) a packing catagory for Korea. All my hygene products are bought! Woohoo! Really I never noticed before now how much I spend on things... it is only when you have to buy them all at the same time (and some in multiples) that you question why you dont use the cheaper generice brand. But of course... I really want these things.. I mean if I am homesick in KW.. at least it will be nice to have some of the comforts of home with me in Korea.
I also made a big expendature yesterday... I broke down and bought a digital camera with extra memory. Since I am bringing my laptop (yay for presents from Daddy)... I wanted to have a digital camera to... well show my world to my friends and family at home. Not only that.. but I have come to notice that my pictures of friends are in the lacking department... so as an advance warning.. in this final month expect to pose :)
I will probably upload some pictures to this blog when I get home (KW) since I dont want to upload the software to my dad's vintage computer here at home... lol... It is such an oldy... Thank heavens they'll be taking mine when I am gone... yay for 2004 technology... you really dont seem to realize the luxuries you have til they are gone... hence the reason that I am trying to savor each one of them up until departure date.
T minus 30 days

Dont rock the boat

I know that since I have only 1 month left here at Crawford I should just bite my tongue and "not rock the boat".. but I am finding that it is becoming extremely difficult for me to sit idoly by as I am being insulted and judged. I know that Crawford is a great place to work.. I mean hey I should get referral fees for all the people I have given the boss' email too... but like any company.. it has its kinks that need to be worked out.
The main issue is that.. well since it is shift work and your supervisor can not always see you.. they leave error msgs and lists of what you have done wrong in your inbox. I dont know about you.. but there comes a point when you have gotten so many msgs of the reprimanding sort that you are disheartened even opening your inbox.
I am fully aware that I am fallible.. I mean hey I own the Chelsea moments.. that being said... I strongly feel that Crawford doesnt even give you the benefit of the doubt... it doesnt even seem to cross their mind that their may have been a computer glitch... or mitigating circumstances surrounding the "logged error" incident.
I know that I shouldnt rock the boat.. since I am soooo close to leaving... especially on good terms... but find that I am becoming more and more upset and hurt by this lack of confidence lately. I really need to grow a thicker skin.
Combined with the fact that I am on graveyards this week (11pm-9am).. so im soo tired... and basically over sensitive... I think that sending me the msg that they did... well wasnt the brightest of ideas.
I just have to keep reminding myself that I have one month.. one month left. Calm blue ocean.... Calm Blue Ocean... CALM BLUE OCEAN!@#@!

If misery loves company.. then why am I so alone?

A couple of days back I was listening to a friend recount the news in their life... and how happy they were and stuff... and well... all I could think was "Man.. this person is really getting on my nerves!" I found myself getting annoyed with the ooberly happy person and found that I just wanted their ooberness to go away.
It's odd how when people are upset we attempt to comfort them... provide words of solace.... lend a shoulder to cry on.... but the opposite is not always true. I have found that when someone is ooberly happy... I just want to throw up... isnt that an odd reaction? Really should we not celebrate the accomplishments as well as failures of our friends and comerades?!
It is like the saying that it takes a lot more muscles to frown than it does to smile... but really when you take the bus during the day how many people do you actually see sitting their smiling? Im not sure about other people.. but when I am not consciously thinking about it I dont smile... I dont think that I frown either.. I think that I am expressionless.
Anyways.. I just thought that I would share my "hummm" moment.

OUCH! This actually hurt more than my 3 tatoos... if you can believe it! 

Cause you gotta have faith

While I was at home a couple of weeks back.. I was cornered by my sister's roommate into a discussion regarding religion and faith... and though her roommate is a very nice person... she is very strong in her convictions and attempts to push them on others.
I really dont like discussing religion and faith with people because I feel the fact that I am a PK (pastor's kid) is a lot of the time held against me.. what I mean is that since my father is so strong in his beliefs... they automotically feel that I should follow suit... and well this is not always the case.
Anyways.. the roommate began asking what I believed and somehow... it came up that I believed that the Bible was a parable (a life lesson) and that I believed in certain aspects of each religion. I believe in the Judaic view that Jesus is a prophet... I believe in the Buddhist ying and yang and Karma... I believe certain Muslim teachings... and I believe in the theory of evolution.
To this the roommate stated that my faith was wishy washy and that I could not just pick and choose the good parts of religion... WHY NOT?!?... Many Christians do so.. they choose to eliminate certain teachings and views once held because they are now considered out dated and incorrect... so tell me please.. why can't I?
I then stated that though I may disagree with her views.. I respected them and believed that her faith was personal and if it worked for her and if she believed it to be correct.. then for her it was.
I thought I did a good thing.. I thought that I was respecting her religion... I was wrong. To this the roommate became more angered and stated that it was pluralistic views like the one that I held that was demoralizing religion and faith. She then stated that because our education system was teaching political correctness to avoid infringing on people's religious rights... that they were in turn insulting her.
She stated that since she believed that her view was the only truth... to state that her faith was correct while mine was correct as well.. in fact insulted and diminished her faith since she believed that their could not more than one truth.
Really.. it is views like that that cause problems.
I know that not all Christians are like this... pushy and demoralizing... but if you think about it.. if anyone were to convert me to Christianity.. would it not be my father... and would you not think that you would attract more people to your faith with honey than with vinegar?!
I am very glad that this person is able to feel confident in their religious stance... that being said.. because I am not 100% sure myself on where I stand... I refuse to discount any one faith.
Really... can't we just agree to disagree?!?

Korea Bound in Two Months and Counting

So it is two months and counting beginning this evening.
I will be heading over to Korea (south) for a year contract to teach English as a second Language with Footprints Recruiting. I am pretty excited... and well... pretty scared.
I am really not second guessing myself. I think I have way too much to do to allow myself to second guess itself.I have to literally buy a brand new wardrobe..... get my visa... sign my contract... buy like a thousand little things (hygenic stuff) that I refuse to live without...
Everyone that finds out what I am doing keeps asking me if I am nervous or how Im feeling about this momentous decision... and though I tell them that I am fine... in all honesty.. I am scared shittless... not that I am second guessing myself at all... since I strongly feel that this is where I need to be and what I am being called to do... but... well to leave one's homeland... family.. friends... lifestyle... and just start anew... well it is a tad unnerving.
I know that I will do fine though and know that well if I hate it... I can always just come home.. or that I will find some solace in the fact that I am there only a year... I mean hey.. I hate Kitchener and surprisingly I have lasted 5.
To pay the bills I am currently at Crawford Adjusters Canada.. doing in take work.. basically I am a glorified call center agent. Though it pays really well.... it is not my passion... and well I have my days where walking out in the middle of my shift seems possible. In all honesty they have been really nice to me though... I have given them notice for Korea and they stated that if I ever wanted to come back that the job was mine... and they have worked it out that even though I am done April 25.. (and counting).. I will get paid up until May 15... so the cash sitch shouldnt be that bad for the first bit of unemployment.
Anyways.. this is my first post in this journal... I am hoping to use it as a recap for what I experience in Korea.. in addition to a form of communication with my family and friends here at home... I hope that it will work... as my LJ and I were pretty close....
I started my LJ with a disclaimer and I think I will add it to this one as well:
Things that I write in here are my thoughts, rants and experiences.. If I in anyway insult or cause concern to any of this journal's readers... please know that I have a lot to work out in my head... and if you take offense to anything read.. please let me know.. or just realize that I may not mean things the way they come across.. and if I do.. well it is a journal to vent my thoughts and expressions... so please take things lightly... though I will try to keep the bitching about others to a minimum... as there is enough bad karma in this world.. and I no longer want to add to that